• A serious non-satirical resource website exposing the extortion, manipulation of the internet and dissemination of propaganda perpetrated by Yelp.com

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Articles • Complaints • News • Warnings • Legal Action regarding Yelp.com

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“Yelp!” Lyrics

Yelp! YouTube Video

Yelp! YouTube Video

 

 

 

 

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPzQmLa8vXc

 

Download and print the lyrics here: “Yelp!” Lyrics

Contact: lucy@yelpfiction.comyelp collusion 750

Is Yelp legitimate?

Still not convinced?

Yelp’s algorhythm?

Example “screen-shots”

Beat Yelp at their own game!

So how does Yelp treat it’s paying customers with the money they extort?

 Many of the tens of thousands of online links regarding Yelp.com’s practices and extortion.

Jeremy Stoppelman; founder, extortionist, white-collar criminal and CEO of Yelp.com

Jeremy Stoppelman; founder, extortionist, white-collar criminal and CEO of Yelp.com. His family, friends and temple must be awful proud of him!

yelp-screws-america-4

jsyj

Propaganda-Tool

Yelp-Extortion-Hate-Love-Us

•••

 godfather-yelp

YelpFiction.com is a resource site to share information, network and educate the world about Yelp.com’s “mob mentality” of creating fictional internet content about businesses and extorting money from these businesses for their own financial gain.

They do not care if the data is positive or negative, newsworthy or tabloid.  As long as people click upon their site (Yelp.com) they increase their popularity upon the world wide web and then are able to demand higher advertising dollars from businesses to participate and perpetuate their scheme. yelpsmear

Unlike legitimate information sites, directories and search engines, Yelp.com does not verify the content for accuracy whether it be fictional, defamatory, created by a fictional person or alias or even if the reviewer was a party to a purchase, service or contract.

Yelp.com extorts money from businesses by forcing the business to advertise with them and then places the ads in regions where the business (business paying Yelp) may not even be located in or affiliated with for the business type that the consumer is seeking in an attempt to draw attention to businesses who are less qualified to provide services therefore doing a great disservice to the public at large.  Yelp will literally “place” you in any geographic area or expose you to the demographic that you wish if you will pay them for advertising.

One gentleman that I spoke with who is currently being strong armed by Yelp.com is still paying them.  He is in fear for his life, reputation, business and well being.  He told me that the first thing he asks new customers is, “Where did you hear about me from?”  If they say Yelp.com he claims his anxiety raises to extreme levels knowing that he must treat these customers with “kid gloves”  The strange issue is that if you do a search for the most popular business types in the valley (wineries), the first business that comes up for this company who is vaguely associated with wineries and makes .5% of what the local wineries do.  Yelp is just trying to give preferential treatment for business types that consumers are not even searching for.bad-sign

Again, Yelp is fictional; manipulating information and extorting money from businesses everywhere.  YOU are probably a victim and don’t even know it.  Everything is fictional about them from their posts to their aliases that they converse with you through email.

Most people accept sites like Facebook and Twitter to be social sites and don’t take the content too seriously.  However, Yelp.com masquerades itself as a legitimate internet search tool like Google, Bing or Yahoo, etc. as well as a resource site when, in reality, the consumer is being bombarded with specially manipulated information that it force-feeds to the public while contributing to the failure of many small businesses and further divides the upper and lower classes by helping to assist in the demise and genocide of the middle class.

Uma-Y

Lucy

Yelp will “bury” (hide) negative reviews about companies who pay them for advertising.  If you do not pay they do the complete opposite by highlighting negative reviews and fictitious reviews and not even taking positive reviews into consideration as they “feed” the information to hundreds of thousands of website around the globe in an effort to defame and ruin companies that do not pay.

In a cowardly fashion, they hide behind the constitution by claiming that they are not liable for third party reviews.  They then claim that they have an “algorhythm” that disseminates all information.  This is ridiculous because an algorhythm in created by a human and can be altered by a human.  In fact, as all computer programmers know you have to constantly update your programs (algorhythms) to keep up with changes from Microsoft and Apple and to also keep your program and system lees vulnerable to hackers and viruses.

These days, any company that uses “alias” names for their employees is obviously up to no good and participating in unethical and illegal activities.  In fact, when I took them to court recently the “process server” who served the court order said that they do a lot of servicing to Yelp and that is why Yelp has armed guards in their lobby.

Go to the mattresses

Go to the mattresses

yelp-5-13-2013

It is obvious that the laws need to b updated and amended to address the very laws that Yelp.com contorts, mocks and gets away with with there tactics using technicalities and loopholes.

I know that even here in California, any licensed professional must post their name upon the internet or upon a business card in black ink at a certain sized “point script” or larger.  Yet Yelp hides there “buried reviews” behind small,  grayed-out links that are easily overlooked and hard to find.  In other words, they are using creative web design, difficult to identify link placement (links on most websites are most commonly “blue” in color and underlined) and deception to bypass current laws.  To make matters worse, they use some of the most difficult “Captchas” that I have ever seen in an attempt to dissuade people away from what they hide.  Captchas are those cryptic letters, words and numbers that are required for you to access content upon a website.  It is typically used so that computers cannot identify the words and proliferate spam.  However, Yelp.com uses these Captchas to their advantage by making them extremely difficult to read the reviews that they have buried.

According to a Harvard Business School study, the loss of every star upon Yelp equates to a 5% to 9% drop in annual revenue for businesses.  Read the article at: http://hbswk.hbs.edu/item/6836.html  Stop allowing Yelp to condescend to all of us as if the concept of an algorhythm is much too advance for the majority of the public at large.

Contact: lucy@yelpfiction.com

•••

A Yelp-abused-businessperson has compiled a tutorial and “how-to” set of videos and resources. Check it out at:http://traininglab.yelpcoach.com/

•••

Still not convinced?yelp-articles-about-extortion

Use your favorite search engine and look for stories, news articles, exposés, etc. about Yelp.com and extortion.  The numbers change daily because Yelp’s legal and technical staff are constantly manipulating internet content.  As an example (at right; click to view) just typing in the term: “yelp articles about extortion” returned a stunning 1,160,000 results.  Try your own searches and change up the words and phraseology   It’s only a matter of time before the FTC, state Attorneys General, Congress and others re-write current, vague laws and shut Yelp down for good.

If you suspect that someone, anyone is posting fictitious reviews about you or your business or is setting up email and user accounts to defame you or your business, please report them to the FBI at: http://www.justice.gov/criminal/cybercrime/reporting.html

yelpfiction200px

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Yelp’s Algorithm?

What a joke!  Yelp claims that their algorithm is fool-proof, infallible and does not offer any prejudice or preferential treatment.  Bull!  An “algorhythm” defined:

According to Wikipedia an “algorhythm” is the data that defines a “computer program” and is therefor synonymous.  Yelp uses the word “algorhythm” condescendingly because most people think that it is a term and concept that is beyond the average computer user.

According to a technical report by Yuri Gurevich of “Microsoft Research”  an algorhythm is more “mathematical” than the “introspective and/or analytical” perfect robotic software that Yelp alleges.  This article can be viewed here: http://research.microsoft.com/pubs/155608/209-3.pdf

Result: An alogorythm IS NOT independent, self aware or not in need of ongoing human interaction, manipulation and updating.

Here are some examples and many, many more will be added in time and the public is invited to submit more “screenshots” of questionable tactics by Yelp.

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So how does Yelp treat it’s paying customers with the money they extort?
By throwing lavish parties for their “Elite Members” all at YOUR expense!  Call it what you want: “the skim,” “the vig,” the pay-off,” “protection money,” “pizzo,” etc.  But just like any other criminal organization, once you start paying, you don’t ever want to think of what will happen to you if you stop!

yelp elite

 

 

yelp elite 2

 

Yes, Yelp.com can get your business to…

“Number One, …With a Bullet!”

yelp shell 750

 

Contact: lucy@yelpfiction.com

The sad fact is that millions of businesses are getting Yelp’d without a kiss. lips-100

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►►► YELP WARNING and ALERT: A person Identifying herself as Daniela Stolfi-Tow from an undisclosed Hawaiian news agency has been collaborating with Daniel A. Bernath and others suspected of being informants to Yelp.com. It is advised that you do not communicate with her regarding any of your dealings with Yelp.com as her (and their) intentions are highly questionable.

(Daniel A. Bernath vs. “Daniela.” Suspicious???)

She has refused to completely identify herself and will not respond to my telephone calls or emails and is instead asking that I disclose my evidence that I possess regarding Yelp.com’s illegal activities. She further refuses to verify her credentials in a civil manner via telephone calls or emails.

The following email was sent to her in warning:

••• Please be advised that your lack of response is extremely suspicious as to your intentions and affiliations.

Your voice messages and emails have been retained for legal evidence. Your association with Daniel A Bernath further arouses suspicions.

If you refuse to properly and completely identify yourself and disclose your intentions transparently you will be reported to local and Hawaii news agencies, Attorneys Generals and law enforcement agencies as Yelp.com’s business tactics are very “mob-like” and my business, family and personal interests are at risk to defamation, libel, slander and bodily harm.

I refuse to be intimidated but will not hesitate to take any and all legal and physical actions and to protect myself, business, family and property to the fullest extent of the law not to mention that I have no qualms about exposing your actions to the public, media and law enforcement.

Further, your (alleged) name and stated affiliation will be disclosed upon Facebook in an effort to thwart your illicit intentions and exploitations to those who may fall victim to your questionable intent.

Beat Yelp at their own game!

Article: April 29, 2013… One on the many ways to beat Yelp with their own tactics is to go to your Yelp page, get into the “filtered reviews” section, create screenshots of the many reviews that they hide, post the screen shots to Facebook, Twitter, blogs, your website, etc.

How do you create a “screen shot?”  (To create a screenshot for your own evidence and sharing, call up any page upon the internet.  Press “ctrl + print screen” [located above the "insert" key].  Then paste the stored info into a program like “Word” or “Paint” or “Photoshop.”  Then save your file.  Feel free to save any and all anomalies and evidence of Yelp’s corrupt activity)

Important note: If you do post screen shots anywhere upon the net, Google CANNOT read and give credit for text contained “within an image” because it’s robots cannot read the image.  It is important that you re-type the text that was posted  and place the text above, beside or beneath the image so that Google can index the information and give you and your business the proper credit!

 

Is Yelp Legitimate?

Are their reviews fabricated?
Do they bury positive reviews?
Do they extort money from small businesses?
The fury from businesspeople across the country continues.  You be the judge.

Back to the top

Here are a few of the tens of thousands of articles questioning Yelp’s ethics, legitimacy and business practices.

http://www.courthousenews.com/2014/01/09/64385.htm 

Just like gangs, mobsters and criminal organizations, Yelp even allows prison inmates to exchange data (undoubtedly for payback connections and ties to those willing to carry out vengeance).  No doubt that Yelp.com believes that these ties and connections will come in handy for them in the future.  (Washington Post news)  With few other outlets, inmates review prisons on Yelp: http://www.washingtonpost.com/national/with-few-other-outlets-for-complaints-inmates-review-prisons-on-yelp/2013/04/27/59cc3440-9e24-11e2-a2db-efc5298a95e1_story.html?page=print

Link posted by YelpFiction reader on 5/01/2013:  http://www.yelp.com/topic/monterey-yelp-is-a-scam-ad-agency  – He writes: “Here’s another example of the “my review was filtered”Yelp-is-a-scam-SS-5-1-2013 thread…but as soon as Yelp ‘sees’ this, the person’s review is unfiltered.  Big brother is watching.”  To see a screen shot of this review before Yelp has a chance to remove it, please see image at right.

The text reads: James “Yelp is a scam” K. says:  

Did you know that Yelp and the Better Business Bureau are just ad agencies? They exist to sell positive reviews to their members. Restaurants who pay to buy Yelp services get negative reviews filtered. I have had this done twice; the last time, i stopped reviewing. But here’s what yelp decided might hurt their client, John Pisto’s Whaling Station. My review:  

John Pisto’s Whaling Station. Very expensive place to go, in our case to celebrate my wife’s birthday. 4 of us went there on a Wednesday night with reservations and a 20 mile drive through a rain storm. We were seated promptly. There were maybe 5 other tables with customers in the dining area. From then on, we were ignored by our waiter. We at least had plenty of bread to eat while we waited about 20 minutes to place our orders. I noticed there was a tray of meat cuts, but our waiter never went to the trouble of showing them to us. he was too pre-occupied with 4 diners who arrived 15 minutes after we did and seemed to be VIPs, buying lobster and drinking lots of bottles of wine. They got his full attention, even in the middle of his Caesar salad preparation. Dinner took almost 2 1/2  hours, without coffee or dessert. We were never shown a dessert tray, and a menu was offered after we requested our check. This evening was ruined by insultingly inattentive service. But it gets worse. The next morning I emailed John Pisto a respectful complaint. I waited almost 2 days before I realized he wasn’t going to respond, so I  put a negative review on Trip Advisor, calling the management terrible. It gets even worse. As soon as that review was posted 3 days later, I get a call at home from Mr. Pisto. Was he calling to say he was sorry about our experience? We did blow $400 on the fiasco. No, he lit into me for daring to call such a seasoned, busy restaurateur a terrible manager (I don’t think he was even there the night of our visit.) Then, after chewing me out (no swear words, at least), he hung up on me. That, folks, is somebody who doesn’t care about satisfying his customers, only about his, and his restaurant’s, reputation. Forget the folksy persona he exudes on his cooking shows, web sites,  and newspaper columns. Dine here at your own risk, and believe all the negative reviews, especially the ones that are “filtered” .

 

Interesting YELP finding: I was curious about what Yelp.com classifies itself when it comes to business “SIC” code.  According to Wikipedia: The Standard Industrial Classification (abbreviated SIC) is a system for classifying industries by a four-digit code. Established in the United States in 1937, it is used by government agencies to classify industry areas.
yelp-8-k
According to ventureline.com, Yelp.com is classified as a “2721” business. This classification defines it as a “Periodicals: Publishing or Publishing & Printing” entity, just as many have been saying online that Yelp is a “Yellow Page” type business that caters to their advertisers.  http://www.ventureline.com/financial-statement-analysis/YELP/ixia-financial-statement-analysis/

 

However, in Yelp’s latest SEC (Securities and Exchange Commission) required filings, EdgarOnline reports that Yelp.com within its “8-K” filing considers itself a SIC classification  “7200” or: ►Services-Personal Services, Industry Printing & Publishing. http://idc.api.edgar-online.com/efx_dll/edgarpro.dll?FetchFilingConvPDF1?SessionID=BqXFFZyNQCvUZIS&ID=9059907

 

EdgarOnline shows that, by comparison, Google.com is filed its form 8-K indentifying itself as a SIC Code “7370” – ►Computer Programming, Data Processing, And Industry Computer Services, Sector Technology.  http://files.shareholder.com/downloads/GOOGLE/2086685780x0xS1193125-12-427116/1288776/1193125-12-427116.pdf

 

If you want to talk about “algorithms” it appears that Google (as most of us suspect) is legitimate and Yelp caters to its paying advertisers and further describes itself as a “personal services” company.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/02/botto-bistro-yelp_n_5923910.html

http://www.eater.com/2011/7/20/6668209/yelp-accused-of-five-star-review-extortion

http://www.eater.com/2014/8/8/6173663/yelp-sued-for-defrauding-shareholders

http://www.ktvu.com/news/news/local/richmond-restaurant-launches-fight-against-yelp-re/nhP7G/

http://uproxx.com/webculture/2014/09/a-san-francisco-restaurant-has-stepped-up-to-the-plate-to-wage-war-on-yelp/

http://insidescoopsf.sfgate.com/blog/2014/09/17/richmond-restaurant-owner-encourages-bad-yelp-reviews/

http://www.valuewalk.com/2014/09/yelp-settles-lawsuit-collecting-data-children/

http://www.marketwatch.com/story/attention-yelp-inc-investors-yelp-requires-payment-to-suppress-negative-reviews-according-to-a-recently-filed-class-action-2014-08-07

http://www.cnn.com/2014/09/12/tech/web/california-law-yelp/

http://nypost.com/2014/09/06/anger-over-courts-decision-on-yelps-reviews/

http://m.sfweekly.com/foodie/2014/09/05/yelp-now-has-court-permission-to-change-business-ratings-for-money-dont-forget-it

http://valleywag.gawker.com/lawsuit-says-yelp-made-millions-forcing-businesses-to-p-1617941464

http://blog.sfgate.com/techchron/2014/08/07/yelp-faces-shareholder-lawsuit-over-fraudulent-reviews/

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/23/fake-yelp-reviews_n_3976415.html

http://www.eastbayexpress.com/oakland/yelp-and-the-business-of-extortion-20/Content?oid=1176635&showFullText=true

http://www.ksat.com/news/defenders/Defenders-investigation-Yelp-reportedly-filters-out-positive-reviews/-/478436/19077322/-/9acxquz/-/index.html

Ripoff Report: Yelp

http://www.yelp.com/topic/saint-paul-missing-positive-reviews-left-only-with-one-fake-negative-review-from-disgrunted-former-employee#pageBottom

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/02/11/ruth-reichl-yelp-zagat_n_2661647.html

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/contractor-sues-bad-yelp-review-article-1.1215705

Business-owners-seek-to-revive-payola-lawsuit-again

Ripoff Report: Yelp Complaint Directory

Techcrunch: Yelp Complaints and Lawsuits

Yelp and the business of extortion 2.0

Yelp-extortion-the-lawsuits-dismissed-are-they-back-at-it-in-2012

http://yelp-sucks.com/

https://twitter.com/#!/fightyelpfilter

ABC News: Yelp Faces Extortion Claim, Class Action Suit

Inc. Magazine: You’ve Been Yelped

San Diego Channel 10 News: Yelp

http://techcrunch.com/2010/03/17/complaints-against-yelps-extortion-practices-grow-louder/

http://sfappeal.com/news/2011/05/yelp-is-now-the-mayor-of-us-district-court.php

http://www.bizjournals.com/sanfrancisco/stories/2010/03/01/daily81.html

http://www.seroundtable.com/archives/018762.html

http://lawyers.codelives.info/lawsuits/yelps-class-action-lawsuit/#comment-7746

http://saveusfromyelp.com/

http://yelpscam.com/complaints.html

http://www.yelpscam.com/

http://www.yelpscam.com/negative-yelp-comment-count.html

http://yelp.pissedconsumer.com/

http://www.thepetitionsite.com/867/995/092/stop-yelp-from-unfairly-destroying-small-businesses/

http://sanfrancisco.citysearch.com/review/602579740

http://www.thereviewbuster.com/yelp-hurting-businesses/

http://www.growmap.com/yelp-no/

http://www.classactioncomplaint.com/2011/02/yelp-lawsuit-charges-extortion-and-fake.html

http://www.yelpphonenumber.com/fake_yelp_reviews.php

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=th251ipwSzE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yo8kfV9kONw&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbPjK6cTqAc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAmDS6daMxs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_y9k4ycO08

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qzchl4xZeC8

http://nymag.com/news/business/bigmoney/58046/

http://eater.com/archives/2012/09/11/logically-pizzeria-owners-shop-becomes-yelp-target-after-obama-bear-hug-2.php

http://www.reddit.com/r/technology/comments/1cgqts/report_yelpcom_extorting_small_businesses/

http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2012/02/27/2-investigators-businesses-yelping-about-review-driven-web-site/

http://www.forbes.com/sites/nextavenue/2013/01/07/the-perils-of-posting-scathing-reviews-on-yelp-and-angies-list/

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&location=Denver%2C+CO&sort_type=message_time_stamp

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&sort_type=message_time_stamp&location=Minneapolis%2C+MN

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&sort_type=message_time_stamp&location=Washington%2C+DC

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&sort_type=message_time_stamp&location=New+York%2C+NY

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&sort_type=message_time_stamp&location=Dallas%2C+TX

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&location=Boston%2C+MA&sort_type=message_time_stamp

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&location=Detroit%2C+MI

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&location=Palo+Alto%2C+CA&sort_type=message_time_stamp

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&location=San+Diego%2C+CA&sort_type=message_time_stamp

http://www.yelp.com/message_board_search?talk_query=I+like+cheeseburgers&location=Seattle%2C+WA&sort_type=message_time_stamp

http://pixsym.com/blog/reputation-management/yelp-extortion-the-lawsuits-dismissed-are-they-back-at-it-in-2012 – this is extremely interesting, especially the posts from people at the end of this blog.

http://womeninbusiness.about.com/od/yelp-help/a/Is-Yelp-Guilty-Of-Digital-Racketeering-Extortion-Or-Unfair-Business-Practices.htm

http://www.reddit.com/r/technology/comments/1cgqts/report_yelpcom_extorting_small_businesses/?limit=500

http://blumenthals.com/blog/2013/01/21/yelp-real-people-real-reviews-deceptive-sales-tactics/

To file a BBB complaint: http://www.bbb.org/greater-san-francisco/business-reviews/internet-services/yelpcom-in-san-francisco-ca-193927/file-a-complaint

http://www.bbb.org/greater-san-francisco/business-reviews/internet-services/yelpcom-in-san-francisco-ca-193927 – the complaint resolution log count goes up daily as businesses add their complaint.  There were 866 complaints as of 4/12/2013.

http://sueyelp.webstarts.com/ http://sueyelp.webstarts.com/uploads/Yelp_Victim_Information_Sheet.pdf – this is what I believe is a lawsuit in the works.  I’d email him initially though, to check.

A defeated lawsuit: http://dockets.justia.com/docket/california/candce/3:2010cv01321/225855/

http://www.ibtimes.com/yelp-extortion-rampant-say-small-business-owners-class-action-lawsuit-against-review-bully-appealed

https://www.facebook.com/WeHateYelp?ref=stream

http://www.yelpdeceives.com/ – some business owners have been taking the time to send this link to everyone on their yelp page who has a filtered review.

http://www.myfoxtwincities.com/story/21192657/investigators-reservations-over-reviews – a local Mpls station..aired in February 2013.  Here is one of the businesses it references.  http://www.yelp.com/biz/the-smokin-oak-rotisserie-and-grill-red-wing

http://www.bosshi.com/why-yelp-sucks/

http://www.eastbayexpress.com/oakland/yelp-and-the-business-of-extortion-20/Content?oid=1176635

http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/philg/2010/03/15/the-extortionists-at-yelp/

http://www.concurringopinions.com/archives/2012/01/levitt-v-yelp-why-twomblyiqbal-are-regrettable.html

http://blog.charlesgaterealty.com/Blog/bid/9207/What-the-hell-happened-to-our-Yelp-reviews

http://houston.culturemap.com/newsdetail/03-18-10-is-yelp-in-the-business-of-bribery-review-site-sued-for-extortion/

http://www.complaintsboard.com/complaints/yelp-c488100.html

https://www.facebook.com/YelpIsAFraud

http://www.jobrunohair.com/yelp.html

http://www.facebook.com/YelpExtortion?fref=ts

http://www.pbs.org/mediashift/2013/01/yelps-rocky-relationship-with-small-business029.html

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/14/kelly-calandro-yelp-verace-restaurant_n_1885576.html

http://www.complaintsboard.com/complaints/yelpcom-something-consumers-should-know-about-the-yelp-extortion-c650875.html

http://www.mediapost.com/publications/article/173991/business-owners-seek-to-revive-payola-lawsuit-agai.html#axzz2NYXTb7SW

http://saveusfromyelp.com/

http://www.forbes.com/sites/jimhandy/2012/08/16/think-yelp-is-unbiased-think-again/

http://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2012/01/the-yelp-scam

http://blog.ericgoldman.org/archives/2011/10/yelp_gets_compl.htm

http://www.yelp.com/filtered_reviews/4kMBvIEWPxWkWKFN__8SxQ?fsid=D31kzGR7yvOfkjiJL4VOKw – filtered reviews for yelp on the yelp website – many unhappy business owners with the same tale of filtered reviews.

http://www.businessweek.com/articles/2012-03-01/taking-stock-of-yelps-ad-sales

http://nymag.com/news/business/bigmoney/58046/

http://dailycaller.com/2013/01/28/foia-release-from-ftc-outs-yelp-as-internet-mafia/

http://www.scpr.org/programs/patt-morrison/2011/08/25/20426/yelpamazonfakereviewcitysearchtripadvisorantislapp

http://www.bizjournals.com/boston/blog/mass_roundup/2013/01/yelp-reviews-skewed-for-advertisers.html

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/08/13/yelp_sales_pitch/

http://www.americanbluesscene.com/2013/01/tacomas-jazzbones-latest-victim-yelps-questionable-business-model/

http://www.crossfitelysium.com/as-rxd/entry/yelp-sucks-part-2-extortion-lies-and-unfair-business-practices

http://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/05/12/why-yelp-works/?apage=3#comments

http://www.ksat.com/news/defenders/Defenders-investigation-Yelp-reportedly-filters-out-positive-reviews/-/478436/19077322/-/9acxquz/-/index.html

http://digitalcommons.law.scu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1287&context=historical

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAmDS6daMxs

https://www.facebook.com/WeHateYelp/notes

http://www.yelpsucks.com/ – Yelp actually bought this domain, so if you click this, you will get transferred back to the Yelp homepage.

http://crushbrands.wordpress.com/2012/11/05/4-reasons-why-yelp-is-no-help/

http://connectingdirectors.com/articles/36122-we-hate-yelp-and-funeral-homes-should-too – and the related link: http://speckmedia.wordpress.com/2012/08/27/i-hate-yelp-and-you-should-too/

http://web.archive.org/web/20080823082125/http://cbs5.com/wrapper_consumer/seenon/Yelp.Internet.ratings.2.787400.html – This is from 2008, granted, old, but still a similar story.

http://www.wfsb.com/story/19646113/local-restaurants-owners-claim-yelpcom-manipulating-reviews?hpt=us_bn7

http://www.raymondfong.net/misc/a-candid-yelp-advertising-review-is-yelp-ripping-people-off/

http://www.limetechsolutions.com/limetech-yelp-reviews/

http://sanfrancisco.citysearch.com/profile/602579740/san_francisco_ca/yelp.html

http://www.718c.com/2011/09/01/yelp-and-the-one-way-anonymous-review-culture/

http://shefzilla.com/?p=18865&cpage=1#comment-17738

http://www.animalfriendspetcare.net/files/Documents/Reviews_of_Animal_Friends_Professional_Pet_Care_on_YELP.pdf

http://esioh.com/bad-yelp-reviews-lead-to-dentist-filing-lawsuit-again-yelp/ – similar article to this one: http://www.drbicuspid.com/index.aspx?sec=sup&sub=pmt&pag=dis&ItemID=311440

http://www.hrabaconsulting.com/blog/2009/04/13/why-you-will-never-trust-yelp-ever-again/

http://www.peopleclaim.com/Yelp/San-Francisco/Complaint-History/?pID=156652 – an interesting site, earns Yelp a grade of F.  Each complaint can be viewed, with the date at the very bottom of the page.  The stories are all similar.

http://kirbysommers.blogspot.com/2013/03/yelp-extortion-of-landlordlinksnet-why.html

http://www.sfgate.com/business/article/Yelp-grows-on-strength-and-grumpiness-of-critics-2369299.php

http://www.glassdoor.com/Reviews/Yelp-Company-Reviews-E43314_P7.htm?sort.sortType=OR&sort.ascending=true – an interesting site..employees (former and current) talk about their experiences.

https://www.facebook.com/YelpExtortion

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/restaurant-owner-two-star-yelp-133000202.html

http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=news/local/san_francisco&id=9080101

More articles about Yelp’s “questionable” business practices:

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CustomerService Numbers.com http://customerservicenumbers.com/co-yelp-customer-service
East Bay Express http://www.eastbayexpress.com/eastbay/yelp-and-the-business-of-extortion-20/Content?oid=1176635
SFGate http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/07/03/BUFU11IP6J.DTL
Complaints Board http://www.complaintsboard.com/complaints/yelpcom-c156716.html
The Consumerist http://consumerist.com/2009/03/more-business-owners-accuse-yelp-of-review-extortion.html…
Deep Thoughts by Raymond Fong http://www.raymondfong.net/misc/a-candid-yelp-advertising-review-is-yelp-ripping-people-off/
The Register http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/08/13/yelp_sales_pitch/
CBS 5 http://cbs5.com/business/yelp.business.complaints.2.820867.html#addComments
The Wall Street Journal http://blogs.wsj.com/digits/2009/02/20/yelp-disputes-extortion-story/
Pro Commerce http://phillips.blogs.com/goc/2008/07/the-yelp-mess.html
Topix.com http://www.topix.com/forum/burlingame/T8C2PMUTRST3C6BCT#comments
SF Eater http://sf.eater.com/archives/2009/09/30/the_life_and_times_of_kozy_kar_bar…
The Daily Californian http://www.dailycal.org/article/104263/web_site_s_advertising_practices_criticized
Gawker.com http://gawker.com/5398244/yelps-lost-chance-to-prevent-a-brawl
MercuryNews.com http://forums.mercurynews.com/topic/obrien-yelp-controversy-is-a-digital-culture-clash
SFist http://sfist.com/2009/09/16/yelp_shakedown_humphry_slocombe.php
Marketing Pilgrim http://www.marketingpilgrim.com/2009/02/yelp-extortion-true-or-false.html
Minger.net http://www.minger.net/2007/11/22/yelp-battles-supporters-of-the-meier-family/
The Washington Times http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2009/mar/23/social-web-sites-ethics-questioned/
SF Weekly.com http://blogs.sfweekly.com/thesnitch/2009/03/they_hate_us_on_yelp_and_want.php
Universal Hub http://www.universalhub.com/node/24849
psfk http://www.psfk.com/2008/08/getting-yelped-and-fighting-back.html
GetSatisfaction.com http://getsatisfaction.com/yelp/topics/un_yelp_my_business
East Bay Express http://techstartups.blogspot.com/2009/03/east-bay-express-yelp-extortion-part-2.html
Tech Vibes http://www.techvibes.com/blog/vancouver-coffee-blogger-gets-kicked-off-yelp
Marshall Kirkpatrick http://marshallk.com/is-yelp-deleting-bad-reviews-for-money-i-have-no-idea
Blogging Censorship http://ncacblog.wordpress.com/2009/01/13/more-yelping-about-yelp-lawsuits/
SF Weekly.com http://blogs.sfweekly.com/thesnitch/2008/11/is_yelp_extorting_san_fran_bus.php
Bmighty.com http://bmighty.informationweek.com/…
Ripoff Report http://www.ripoffreport.com/Websites/Yelp-com/yelp-com-good-reviews-only-ple-34525.htm
Tech Dirt http://techdirt.com/article.php?sid=20090113/2207453397&op=sharethis
Los Angeles Tech culture http://lalawag.com/foursquare-disregard-yelp-acquire-currency/
CBS 5 http://cbs5.com/wrapper_consumer/seenon/Yelp.Internet.ratings.2.787400.html…
Ny News and Features http://nymag.com/news/business/bigmoney/58046/
PC World http://www.pcworld.com/article/159839/is_yelp_manipulating_user_reviews.html
Chow http://www.chow.com/blog/2008/07/free-food-or-ill-yelp/

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Contact: lucy@yelpfiction.com

The Constitution of the United States: A Transcription

Note: The following text is a transcription of the Constitution in its original form.
Items that are hyperlinked have since been amended or superseded.


We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.


Article. I.

Section. 1.

All legislative Powers herein granted shall be vested in a Congress of the United States, which shall consist of a Senate and House of Representatives.

Section. 2.

The House of Representatives shall be composed of Members chosen every second Year by the People of the several States, and the Electors in each State shall have the Qualifications requisite for Electors of the most numerous Branch of the State Legislature.

No Person shall be a Representative who shall not have attained to the Age of twenty five Years, and been seven Years a Citizen of the United States, and who shall not, when elected, be an Inhabitant of that State in which he shall be chosen.

Representatives and direct Taxes shall be apportioned among the several States which may be included within this Union, according to their respective Numbers, which shall be determined by adding to the whole Number of free Persons, including those bound to Service for a Term of Years, and excluding Indians not taxed, three fifths of all other Persons. The actual Enumeration shall be made within three Years after the first Meeting of the Congress of the United States, and within every subsequent Term of ten Years, in such Manner as they shall by Law direct. The Number of Representatives shall not exceed one for every thirty Thousand, but each State shall have at Least one Representative; and until such enumeration shall be made, the State of New Hampshire shall be entitled to chuse three, Massachusetts eight, Rhode-Island and Providence Plantations one, Connecticut five, New-York six, New Jersey four, Pennsylvania eight, Delaware one, Maryland six, Virginia ten, North Carolina five, South Carolina five, and Georgia three.

When vacancies happen in the Representation from any State, the Executive Authority thereof shall issue Writs of Election to fill such Vacancies.

The House of Representatives shall chuse their Speaker and other Officers; and shall have the sole Power of Impeachment.

Section. 3.

The Senate of the United States shall be composed of two Senators from each State, chosen by the Legislature thereof for six Years; and each Senator shall have one Vote.

Immediately after they shall be assembled in Consequence of the first Election, they shall be divided as equally as may be into three Classes. The Seats of the Senators of the first Class shall be vacated at the Expiration of the second Year, of the second Class at the Expiration of the fourth Year, and of the third Class at the Expiration of the sixth Year, so that one third may be chosen every second Year; and if Vacancies happen by Resignation, or otherwise, during the Recess of the Legislature of any State, the Executive thereof may make temporary Appointments until the next Meeting of the Legislature, which shall then fill such Vacancies.

No Person shall be a Senator who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty Years, and been nine Years a Citizen of the United States, and who shall not, when elected, be an Inhabitant of that State for which he shall be chosen.

The Vice President of the United States shall be President of the Senate, but shall have no Vote, unless they be equally divided.

The Senate shall chuse their other Officers, and also a President pro tempore, in the Absence of the Vice President, or when he shall exercise the Office of President of the United States.

The Senate shall have the sole Power to try all Impeachments. When sitting for that Purpose, they shall be on Oath or Affirmation. When the President of the United States is tried, the Chief Justice shall preside: And no Person shall be convicted without the Concurrence of two thirds of the Members present.

Judgment in Cases of Impeachment shall not extend further than to removal from Office, and disqualification to hold and enjoy any Office of honor, Trust or Profit under the United States: but the Party convicted shall nevertheless be liable and subject to Indictment, Trial, Judgment and Punishment, according to Law.

Section. 4.

The Times, Places and Manner of holding Elections for Senators and Representatives, shall be prescribed in each State by the Legislature thereof; but the Congress may at any time by Law make or alter such Regulations, except as to the Places of chusing Senators.

The Congress shall assemble at least once in every Year, and such Meeting shall be on the first Monday in December, unless they shall by Law appoint a different Day.

Section. 5.

Each House shall be the Judge of the Elections, Returns and Qualifications of its own Members, and a Majority of each shall constitute a Quorum to do Business; but a smaller Number may adjourn from day to day, and may be authorized to compel the Attendance of absent Members, in such Manner, and under such Penalties as each House may provide.

Each House may determine the Rules of its Proceedings, punish its Members for disorderly Behaviour, and, with the Concurrence of two thirds, expel a Member.

Each House shall keep a Journal of its Proceedings, and from time to time publish the same, excepting such Parts as may in their Judgment require Secrecy; and the Yeas and Nays of the Members of either House on any question shall, at the Desire of one fifth of those Present, be entered on the Journal.

Neither House, during the Session of Congress, shall, without the Consent of the other, adjourn for more than three days, nor to any other Place than that in which the two Houses shall be sitting.

Section. 6.

The Senators and Representatives shall receive a Compensation for their Services, to be ascertained by Law, and paid out of the Treasury of the United States. They shall in all Cases, except Treason, Felony and Breach of the Peace, be privileged from Arrest during their Attendance at the Session of their respective Houses, and in going to and returning from the same; and for any Speech or Debate in either House, they shall not be questioned in any other Place.

No Senator or Representative shall, during the Time for which he was elected, be appointed to any civil Office under the Authority of the United States, which shall have been created, or the Emoluments whereof shall have been encreased during such time; and no Person holding any Office under the United States, shall be a Member of either House during his Continuance in Office.

Section. 7.

All Bills for raising Revenue shall originate in the House of Representatives; but the Senate may propose or concur with Amendments as on other Bills.

Every Bill which shall have passed the House of Representatives and the Senate, shall, before it become a Law, be presented to the President of the United States: If he approve he shall sign it, but if not he shall return it, with his Objections to that House in which it shall have originated, who shall enter the Objections at large on their Journal, and proceed to reconsider it. If after such Reconsideration two thirds of that House shall agree to pass the Bill, it shall be sent, together with the Objections, to the other House, by which it shall likewise be reconsidered, and if approved by two thirds of that House, it shall become a Law. But in all such Cases the Votes of both Houses shall be determined by yeas and Nays, and the Names of the Persons voting for and against the Bill shall be entered on the Journal of each House respectively. If any Bill shall not be returned by the President within ten Days (Sundays excepted) after it shall have been presented to him, the Same shall be a Law, in like Manner as if he had signed it, unless the Congress by their Adjournment prevent its Return, in which Case it shall not be a Law.

Every Order, Resolution, or Vote to which the Concurrence of the Senate and House of Representatives may be necessary (except on a question of Adjournment) shall be presented to the President of the United States; and before the Same shall take Effect, shall be approved by him, or being disapproved by him, shall be repassed by two thirds of the Senate and House of Representatives, according to the Rules and Limitations prescribed in the Case of a Bill.

Section. 8.

The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes, Duties, Imposts and Excises, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United States; but all Duties, Imposts and Excises shall be uniform throughout the United States;

To borrow Money on the credit of the United States;

To regulate Commerce with foreign Nations, and among the several States, and with the Indian Tribes;

To establish an uniform Rule of Naturalization, and uniform Laws on the subject of Bankruptcies throughout the United States;

To coin Money, regulate the Value thereof, and of foreign Coin, and fix the Standard of Weights and Measures;

To provide for the Punishment of counterfeiting the Securities and current Coin of the United States;

To establish Post Offices and post Roads;

To promote the Progress of Science and useful Arts, by securing for limited Times to Authors and Inventors the exclusive Right to their respective Writings and Discoveries;

To constitute Tribunals inferior to the supreme Court;

To define and punish Piracies and Felonies committed on the high Seas, and Offences against the Law of Nations;

To declare War, grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal, and make Rules concerning Captures on Land and Water;

To raise and support Armies, but no Appropriation of Money to that Use shall be for a longer Term than two Years;

To provide and maintain a Navy;

To make Rules for the Government and Regulation of the land and naval Forces;

To provide for calling forth the Militia to execute the Laws of the Union, suppress Insurrections and repel Invasions;

To provide for organizing, arming, and disciplining, the Militia, and for governing such Part of them as may be employed in the Service of the United States, reserving to the States respectively, the Appointment of the Officers, and the Authority of training the Militia according to the discipline prescribed by Congress;

To exercise exclusive Legislation in all Cases whatsoever, over such District (not exceeding ten Miles square) as may, by Cession of particular States, and the Acceptance of Congress, become the Seat of the Government of the United States, and to exercise like Authority over all Places purchased by the Consent of the Legislature of the State in which the Same shall be, for the Erection of Forts, Magazines, Arsenals, dock-Yards, and other needful Buildings;–And

To make all Laws which shall be necessary and proper for carrying into Execution the foregoing Powers, and all other Powers vested by this Constitution in the Government of the United States, or in any Department or Officer thereof.

Section. 9.

The Migration or Importation of such Persons as any of the States now existing shall think proper to admit, shall not be prohibited by the Congress prior to the Year one thousand eight hundred and eight, but a Tax or duty may be imposed on such Importation, not exceeding ten dollars for each Person.

The Privilege of the Writ of Habeas Corpus shall not be suspended, unless when in Cases of Rebellion or Invasion the public Safety may require it.

No Bill of Attainder or ex post facto Law shall be passed.

No Capitation, or other direct, Tax shall be laid, unless in Proportion to the Census or enumeration herein before directed to be taken.

No Tax or Duty shall be laid on Articles exported from any State.

No Preference shall be given by any Regulation of Commerce or Revenue to the Ports of one State over those of another; nor shall Vessels bound to, or from, one State, be obliged to enter, clear, or pay Duties in another.

No Money shall be drawn from the Treasury, but in Consequence of Appropriations made by Law; and a regular Statement and Account of the Receipts and Expenditures of all public Money shall be published from time to time.

No Title of Nobility shall be granted by the United States: And no Person holding any Office of Profit or Trust under them, shall, without the Consent of the Congress, accept of any present, Emolument, Office, or Title, of any kind whatever, from any King, Prince, or foreign State.

Section. 10.

No State shall enter into any Treaty, Alliance, or Confederation; grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal; coin Money; emit Bills of Credit; make any Thing but gold and silver Coin a Tender in Payment of Debts; pass any Bill of Attainder, ex post facto Law, or Law impairing the Obligation of Contracts, or grant any Title of Nobility.

No State shall, without the Consent of the Congress, lay any Imposts or Duties on Imports or Exports, except what may be absolutely necessary for executing it’s inspection Laws: and the net Produce of all Duties and Imposts, laid by any State on Imports or Exports, shall be for the Use of the Treasury of the United States; and all such Laws shall be subject to the Revision and Controul of the Congress.

No State shall, without the Consent of Congress, lay any Duty of Tonnage, keep Troops, or Ships of War in time of Peace, enter into any Agreement or Compact with another State, or with a foreign Power, or engage in War, unless actually invaded, or in such imminent Danger as will not admit of delay.


Article. II.

Section. 1.

The executive Power shall be vested in a President of the United States of America. He shall hold his Office during the Term of four Years, and, together with the Vice President, chosen for the same Term, be elected, as follows:

Each State shall appoint, in such Manner as the Legislature thereof may direct, a Number of Electors, equal to the whole Number of Senators and Representatives to which the State may be entitled in the Congress: but no Senator or Representative, or Person holding an Office of Trust or Profit under the United States, shall be appointed an Elector.

The Electors shall meet in their respective States, and vote by Ballot for two Persons, of whom one at least shall not be an Inhabitant of the same State with themselves. And they shall make a List of all the Persons voted for, and of the Number of Votes for each; which List they shall sign and certify, and transmit sealed to the Seat of the Government of the United States, directed to the President of the Senate. The President of the Senate shall, in the Presence of the Senate and House of Representatives, open all the Certificates, and the Votes shall then be counted. The Person having the greatest Number of Votes shall be the President, if such Number be a Majority of the whole Number of Electors appointed; and if there be more than one who have such Majority, and have an equal Number of Votes, then the House of Representatives shall immediately chuse by Ballot one of them for President; and if no Person have a Majority, then from the five highest on the List the said House shall in like Manner chuse the President. But in chusing the President, the Votes shall be taken by States, the Representation from each State having one Vote; A quorum for this purpose shall consist of a Member or Members from two thirds of the States, and a Majority of all the States shall be necessary to a Choice. In every Case, after the Choice of the President, the Person having the greatest Number of Votes of the Electors shall be the Vice President. But if there should remain two or more who have equal Votes, the Senate shall chuse from them by Ballot the Vice President.

The Congress may determine the Time of chusing the Electors, and the Day on which they shall give their Votes; which Day shall be the same throughout the United States.

No Person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States.

In Case of the Removal of the President from Office, or of his Death, Resignation, or Inability to discharge the Powers and Duties of the said Office, the Same shall devolve on the Vice President, and the Congress may by Law provide for the Case of Removal, Death, Resignation or Inability, both of the President and Vice President, declaring what Officer shall then act as President, and such Officer shall act accordingly, until the Disability be removed, or a President shall be elected.

The President shall, at stated Times, receive for his Services, a Compensation, which shall neither be increased nor diminished during the Period for which he shall have been elected, and he shall not receive within that Period any other Emolument from the United States, or any of them.

Before he enter on the Execution of his Office, he shall take the following Oath or Affirmation:–“I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.”

Section. 2.

The President shall be Commander in Chief of the Army and Navy of the United States, and of the Militia of the several States, when called into the actual Service of the United States; he may require the Opinion, in writing, of the principal Officer in each of the executive Departments, upon any Subject relating to the Duties of their respective Offices, and he shall have Power to grant Reprieves and Pardons for Offences against the United States, except in Cases of Impeachment.

He shall have Power, by and with the Advice and Consent of the Senate, to make Treaties, provided two thirds of the Senators present concur; and he shall nominate, and by and with the Advice and Consent of the Senate, shall appoint Ambassadors, other public Ministers and Consuls, Judges of the supreme Court, and all other Officers of the United States, whose Appointments are not herein otherwise provided for, and which shall be established by Law: but the Congress may by Law vest the Appointment of such inferior Officers, as they think proper, in the President alone, in the Courts of Law, or in the Heads of Departments.

The President shall have Power to fill up all Vacancies that may happen during the Recess of the Senate, by granting Commissions which shall expire at the End of their next Session.

Section. 3.

He shall from time to time give to the Congress Information of the State of the Union, and recommend to their Consideration such Measures as he shall judge necessary and expedient; he may, on extraordinary Occasions, convene both Houses, or either of them, and in Case of Disagreement between them, with Respect to the Time of Adjournment, he may adjourn them to such Time as he shall think proper; he shall receive Ambassadors and other public Ministers; he shall take Care that the Laws be faithfully executed, and shall Commission all the Officers of the United States.

Section. 4.

The President, Vice President and all civil Officers of the United States, shall be removed from Office on Impeachment for, and Conviction of, Treason, Bribery, or other high Crimes and Misdemeanors.


Article III.

Section. 1.

The judicial Power of the United States shall be vested in one supreme Court, and in such inferior Courts as the Congress may from time to time ordain and establish. The Judges, both of the supreme and inferior Courts, shall hold their Offices during good Behaviour, and shall, at stated Times, receive for their Services a Compensation, which shall not be diminished during their Continuance in Office.

Section. 2.

The judicial Power shall extend to all Cases, in Law and Equity, arising under this Constitution, the Laws of the United States, and Treaties made, or which shall be made, under their Authority;–to all Cases affecting Ambassadors, other public Ministers and Consuls;–to all Cases of admiralty and maritime Jurisdiction;–to Controversies to which the United States shall be a Party;–to Controversies between two or more States;– between a State and Citizens of another State,–between Citizens of different States,–between Citizens of the same State claiming Lands under Grants of different States, and between a State, or the Citizens thereof, and foreign States, Citizens or Subjects.

In all Cases affecting Ambassadors, other public Ministers and Consuls, and those in which a State shall be Party, the supreme Court shall have original Jurisdiction. In all the other Cases before mentioned, the supreme Court shall have appellate Jurisdiction, both as to Law and Fact, with such Exceptions, and under such Regulations as the Congress shall make.

The Trial of all Crimes, except in Cases of Impeachment, shall be by Jury; and such Trial shall be held in the State where the said Crimes shall have been committed; but when not committed within any State, the Trial shall be at such Place or Places as the Congress may by Law have directed.

Section. 3.

Treason against the United States, shall consist only in levying War against them, or in adhering to their Enemies, giving them Aid and Comfort. No Person shall be convicted of Treason unless on the Testimony of two Witnesses to the same overt Act, or on Confession in open Court.

The Congress shall have Power to declare the Punishment of Treason, but no Attainder of Treason shall work Corruption of Blood, or Forfeiture except during the Life of the Person attainted.


Article. IV.

Section. 1.

Full Faith and Credit shall be given in each State to the public Acts, Records, and judicial Proceedings of every other State. And the Congress may by general Laws prescribe the Manner in which such Acts, Records and Proceedings shall be proved, and the Effect thereof.

Section. 2.

The Citizens of each State shall be entitled to all Privileges and Immunities of Citizens in the several States.

A Person charged in any State with Treason, Felony, or other Crime, who shall flee from Justice, and be found in another State, shall on Demand of the executive Authority of the State from which he fled, be delivered up, to be removed to the State having Jurisdiction of the Crime.

No Person held to Service or Labour in one State, under the Laws thereof, escaping into another, shall, in Consequence of any Law or Regulation therein, be discharged from such Service or Labour, but shall be delivered up on Claim of the Party to whom such Service or Labour may be due.

Section. 3.

New States may be admitted by the Congress into this Union; but no new State shall be formed or erected within the Jurisdiction of any other State; nor any State be formed by the Junction of two or more States, or Parts of States, without the Consent of the Legislatures of the States concerned as well as of the Congress.

The Congress shall have Power to dispose of and make all needful Rules and Regulations respecting the Territory or other Property belonging to the United States; and nothing in this Constitution shall be so construed as to Prejudice any Claims of the United States, or of any particular State.

Section. 4.

The United States shall guarantee to every State in this Union a Republican Form of Government, and shall protect each of them against Invasion; and on Application of the Legislature, or of the Executive (when the Legislature cannot be convened), against domestic Violence.


Article. V.

The Congress, whenever two thirds of both Houses shall deem it necessary, shall propose Amendments to this Constitution, or, on the Application of the Legislatures of two thirds of the several States, shall call a Convention for proposing Amendments, which, in either Case, shall be valid to all Intents and Purposes, as Part of this Constitution, when ratified by the Legislatures of three fourths of the several States, or by Conventions in three fourths thereof, as the one or the other Mode of Ratification may be proposed by the Congress; Provided that no Amendment which may be made prior to the Year One thousand eight hundred and eight shall in any Manner affect the first and fourth Clauses in the Ninth Section of the first Article; and that no State, without its Consent, shall be deprived of its equal Suffrage in the Senate.


Article. VI.

All Debts contracted and Engagements entered into, before the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be as valid against the United States under this Constitution, as under the Confederation.

This Constitution, and the Laws of the United States which shall be made in Pursuance thereof; and all Treaties made, or which shall be made, under the Authority of the United States, shall be the supreme Law of the Land; and the Judges in every State shall be bound thereby, any Thing in the Constitution or Laws of any State to the Contrary notwithstanding.

The Senators and Representatives before mentioned, and the Members of the several State Legislatures, and all executive and judicial Officers, both of the United States and of the several States, shall be bound by Oath or Affirmation, to support this Constitution; but no religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States.


Article. VII.

The Ratification of the Conventions of nine States, shall be sufficient for the Establishment of this Constitution between the States so ratifying the Same.

The Word, “the,” being interlined between the seventh and eighth Lines of the first Page, the Word “Thirty” being partly written on an Erazure in the fifteenth Line of the first Page, The Words “is tried” being interlined between the thirty second and thirty third Lines of the first Page and the Word “the” being interlined between the forty third and forty fourth Lines of the second Page.

Attest William Jackson Secretary

done in Convention by the Unanimous Consent of the States present the Seventeenth Day of September in the Year of our Lord one thousand seven hundred and Eighty seven and of the Independence of the United States of America the Twelfth In witness whereof We have hereunto subscribed our Names,

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List of constitutional rights

A question I often get is to indicate a comprehensive, authoritative list of constitutional rights. Most legal scholars in the past have declined to offer such a list, saying that it would be infinite, so no listing could ever be adequate. Of course, some have provided partial lists, as James Madison did with the Bill of Rights, which included a catch-all, the Ninth Amendment, for all the other rights not made explicit in the other amendments. Essentially, he was referring people to legal history for the details, but too many judges refuse to acknowledge rights that are not spelled out.

I offer two things that try to identify the rights in more detail. The first is a law review article, Presumption of Non-authority and Unenumerated Rights, that goes into the historical background to find what got lumped into the Ninth. The second is a proposed Civil Rights Act to be introduced in Congress. For the convenience of readers, here is the part of that Act that lists the rights:

a. All rights already recognized in the above titles, and in the Constitution as amended.

b. Due process and efficient remediation

1. General

1. Due notice of time, place, manner, parties, and subject of any proceeding with sufficient time to respond.

2. Fair hearing and decision on the legal merits, with redress for just grievances, including damages, property, or injunctive or declaratory relief.

3. Not to have just remedies made inaccessible or excessively difficult or costly.

4. Mandated testimony of witnesses.

5. Unimpeded access to courts, court filing, and grand juries, subject only to routine scheduling.

6. Direct presentation of complaints to a grand jury without the presence of any other government actor without the consent of the grand jury.

7. Standing to privately prosecute a public right without having been injured or expecting personal injury.

8. Not to be subject to retaliation.

9. Not to have admitted any plea or testimony induced by a plea bargain.

10. Not to have any property or asset taken or forfeited without civil or criminal judgment in a trial, with possession presumed to establish title unless proved otherwise.

11. Not to have any right, privilege, or immunity disabled by statute unless one is a minor, which by default shall be any individual under the age of 18 unless the disabilities of minority are extended or reduced by court order.

2. Criminal trials:

1. Indictment by twelve members of a randomly selected grand jury of 23 who elect their foreperson, upon a finding that the court has jurisdiction and that there is sufficient evidence for a trial, except for persons subject to military or militia discipline.

2. Service as prosecutor upon receipt of an indictment by a grand jury, subject only to consolidation by the grand jury if more than one person seeks to prosecute the same offense.

3. Trial by a randomly selected jury of twelve sworn to uphold applicable constitutions in criminal cases for which the penalty is more than 90 days.

4. No excessive bail when there is little flight risk.

5. No excessive fines imposed.

6. No  cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.

7. Speedy and public trial before an impartial jury of the state and district previously defined by law, wherein the offense shall have been committed, and to have the location of commitment be deemed where there was concurrence of mens rea and actus reus.

8. Not to be twice prosecuted for the same offense or same facts under different jurisdictions.

9. To be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the assistance of counsel for his defence, but not to have counsel or an attorney imposed on him without his consent.

10. Not to be compelled to be a witness against himself.

11. Not be disabled in the exercise, or deprived, of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law, by unanimous verdict of a jury of twelve.

12. Unimpeded presentation of all evidence by the defendant, without being subject to a motion in limine.

13. Unimpeded presentation of all legal argument to the jury, up to the final instructions to the jury, except for argument on a motion in limine that cannot be made without disclosing evidence properly excluded.

14. Unimpeded presentation of all pleadings, alternative instructions, and certified copies of applicable laws and constitutions, to the jury.

15. Not to have a sentence that does not separately disable the exercise of the immunity, and order deprivation of it, within the scope of that disablement

3. Civil trials:

Trial by a randomly selected jury of twelve sworn to uphold applicable constitutions in which the amount at issue, including costs, exceeds the equivalent of at least 15.46875 troy ounces of pure silver.

4. Appeals

Appeal from a jury verdict on a writ of error or habeas corpus, according to the rules of the common law in the United States as of 1787, unless the Constitution is amended to provide otherwise.

c. Nonauthority

1. Presumption of nonauthority for any claim to authority, to be strictly proved by an unbroken logical chain of derivation from a constitution.

2. Not to have any government actor exercise a power not delegated, regardless of whether one may be personally injured by such exercise.

3. Not to have government actors exercise powers on the pretext of being “necessary and proper” when they are not just to perform his official duties but to get a desired result beyond such duties.

4. To have delegated powers construed as narrowly, and rights, privileges, or immunities construed as broadly, as the language of the Constitution as meant and understood when ratified permits.

5. Priority docketing of all prerogative writs filed by a any person as demandant in the name of the people with a court of competent jurisdiction and served on the respondant, within three sederunt days, unless the respondant requires more, but not more than 20 calendar days, including but not limited to, demurral, quo warranto, habeas corpus, procedendo, mandamus, prohibito, certiorari, and scire facias, and to have default judgment even if no proof is presented or a hearing is not held.

6. Unimpeded and unpunished communications, including speech, press, and education, except such as instigate or direct a felony, misdemeanor, or tort.

7. Unimpeded assembly and exercise of rights in concert with others.

8. Unimpeded assembly as militia for organizing, training, and response to threats to public safety, subject only to direction by state militia officers during a call-up.

9. Unrestricted keeping and bearing of weapons, equipment, and supplies commonly used by military forces, or suitable for militia, subject only to court order of disablement for being a threat to oneself or others, or to the lawful orders of militia officers during a call-up.

10. Unimpeded and unpunished petition for redress of grievances.

11. Unimpeded devotion or practice of religion, not preferentially supported by public funds, that does not instigate or direct a felony, misdemeanor, or tort.

12. Exclusion of government actors from intrusion into one’s real property, body, or use of one’s personal property, for search, seizure, or for any other reason, without consent, a declared state of war or emergency threat to public, safety, a warrant supported by an affidavit of probable cause, and just compensation for any losses incurred, for each incident.

d. Supervision of government actors

1. Access to observation and recordation of any government proceeding except trial and grand jury deliberations or their equivalent, or deliberations on matters of security requiring secrecy.

2. Receipt of records of all proceedings, and accounting for all receipts, loans, debts, and expenditures, and reporting thereof, for eventual examination prior to an election in which the issues may be reviewed.

3. Accurate recording, counting, and reporting of all votes cast by eligible voters in any public election with protection from disclosure of how each voted.

4. Access to all information about oneself, and either copies at cost of all documentation or to make one’s own copies using one’s own equipment.

5. Effective low-cost remedies for getting information about oneself corrected, and use of such information restricted to that for which there is consent by oneself.

f. Other

1. Association and contract to do things not unlawful, including practice of a profession or occupation, marriage, procreation, and acceptance or denial of medical prevention or treatment, except prevention of contagious diseases.

2. Formation, conduct, and revision or dissolution of corporations, partnerships, and other trusts, in which settlor, trustee, and beneficiary are distinct persons who may not be impeded or penalized from directly appearing in any court in such capacities.

3. Not to have some accorded special privileges or protections that favor them over the rest of the people, in ways not essential to the performance of public duties.

4. Travel within, to, and from the United States and any State, territory or locality.

5. Not to be removed from the location of one’s birth or lawful residence, or impeded from returning thereto.

6. Not to be enslaved or submitted to peonage except as punishment for a crime, but subject to militia, jury, witness, and other public duty.

7. Not to be impeded or punished for voting if one is a citizen and resident on grounds of race, color, creed, previous servitude, gender, age 18 or above, or failure to pay a tax.

8. Custody and care of close relatives who are non sui juris.

9. Not to be neglected or abused while in custody.

10. Not to be denied any right, privilege, or immunity for failure to have or present a name or other form of identification.

11. Not to be deported without proof that one has not been born or naturalized as a citizen, unless one is born to a person not subject to the allegiance of the United States, such as a foreign diplomat or an invader.

12. Not to be subject to penalty for not doing something, such as not paying a tax, if government agents refuse to allow it to be done, such as not accepting payment of a tax.

13. Not to deny relief from some government action for lack of an appropriation to process the application for relief, or having an official to receive the application, and to fail to recognize the demand for such relief as being granted by default.
14. Not to be required to procreate or to refrain from procreating.

g. The foregoing list is not exhaustive, and further rights, privileges, and immunities are to be found in the historical record. The rule of expressio unius est exclusio alterius shall not be applied.

Contact: lucy@yelpfiction.com

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